By Dr. Ricky Arenson
Most couples wish for a sex life like the ones they see in Hollywood movies. Here are some easy strategies to help you turn fantasy into reality:
- Re-engage.
Your sex life is unlikely to improve if you never have sex! Get back in practice by putting aside special times for intimacy.
- Cultivate enjoyment of giving your partner pleasure.
Love is all about giving to each other unselfishly. If you both enjoy pleasing each other, that’s double the fun and satisfaction for both.
- Sex is supposed to be fun!
Laugh together, play together, and stop being so serious about sex!
- Communicate and talk about sex.
Tell your partner what you like and how you want it done. Talking about sex is a turn-on, gets you in the mood, and fires up your mind and body. Sex stops happening if it’s out of sight and out of mind. There’s the bonus of teaching your partner how to give you pleasure.
- Work on your relationship.
The best marriages are built on friendship, kindness, and respect, all necessary ingredients for good sex life. Men may be happy to turn up naked and get going, but many women are turned off by relationship difficulties, or a selfish, insensitive partner. Make your partner feel valued and special.
- Work out what women want.
Men: women enjoy seemingly unimportant details like the mood, the timing, and the right approach. Cavemen have been out of fashion for a million years, so put away that club and let go of her hair. Women don’t like being “used for sex”, so men can enhance their chances by making sure they appreciate their wives, praise them, tell them they’re beautiful and special, and express gratitude. Men like being told that they’re “manly” and “enormous”. Many women prefer different compliments to these.
If you take the time to understand what women really want, this will improve your chances of regular, good sex.
- Share household chores
Studies have proven that the more men help their wives with housework, the more frequently they get laid! If you wash those dishes, your wife may have more time to attend to something you’re really interested in!
- Work on physical fitness and health.
Physical well-being is good for libido, so stay fit, exercise, avoid excessive alcohol, and get enough sleep. Tiredness is a sex killer for many.
- Prioritize good sex.
It’s a cornerstone of happy relationships, so cultivate it, talk about it, work on it, and don’t demote it to being a second-class passenger in your marriage! Creating a positive sexual experience for both partners is the best recipe for a great sex life.